Posts Tagged ‘ zombies ’

New to Austin: Week 6 – wherein I wonder whether I’m about to start craving the taste of delicious brains

December 25, 2011
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New to Austin: Week 6 – wherein I wonder whether I’m about to start craving the taste of delicious brains

The four inch tall goats frolicking on top of my fridge keep tugging on my bills every time I think maybe I should visit a doctor. It’s been five days since my temperature was under 100. According to The Walking Dead, I’m overdue to start craving the taste of delicious brains. I’ve thought about it, but honestly, any food makes me want to vomit up the nonexistant contents of my stomach. Thank goodness I’m hallucinating goats instead of dogs. They say goats will eat anything, but dogs have a disquieting and disgusting fondness for the taste of vomit. Unless I…

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I chatted up a porn star

June 23, 2011
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Veronica Hart

  Jane Hamilton, better known as adult actress Veronica Hart, said she was a high school nerd. Therefore,  it’s no surprise the outspoken advocate of human sexuality was one of the guests at Contamination 2011, a horror, science fiction and cult convention at the St. Louis Westport Sheraton Chalet. You can read my interview with this fun, charming lady here.

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First Contact: Best of Zombies

September 20, 2010
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Reading my blog could give you a rather biased view of the dating pool. To change it up a bit, I thought I’d share some absolutely excellent examples of First Contact emails. These guys can write, are interesting, and clearly paid attention to my profile. I was utterly delighted to hear from every single one of them. None of them resulted in actual dates due to details like conflicting ideological views, them being married, a twenty year age gap, or a complete lack of common interests outside Zombies. However, I want to make it clear to the world that even…

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Zombie Evolution

September 30, 2009
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Once upon a time, Zombies nommed entirely on brains. This was distressing enough, but in recent years their diet has expanded out to bone, gristle, skin and internal organs, capped with brains as almost a sweet. They’re also getting smarter. No more mindless stumbling ala “Dawn of the Dead.” Instead, we now get “30 Days of Night” and “28 Days Later.” My personal favorite iteration so far is the Marvel Zombie. They live with an overwhelming craving for all four human body food groups (meat, bones, organs, and buttery spreadable fat. It makes the bones go down smoother.) If they…

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Lego Zombies!

October 14, 2008
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Oh, Dvice! You bring me the best prezzies. Today, zombies invade our childhood to gnosh on our innocent little brains as we squee in delight at their undead antics. Check the article for links to closeups of Lego on Lego undead action.

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Zombie Chow: Five undead recipes that begin with a burial

October 10, 2008
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Zombie Chow: Five undead recipes that begin with a burial

You know you’re into some freaky food when the recipes require a shovel, a hole, and invoke the words “putrefy” and “exhume.” Check out five delicacies that only a zombie could love.

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Undead, but not alone

October 8, 2008
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After you’ve eaten your screaming family’s brains and trolled the highways for delicious babies abandoned in car seats, the decaying remains of your heart my call out for someone with whom you can share the joys of the new world order. You don’t have to be alone.  If you’re looking for that special undead someone you can gaze at over the burning wreck of a semi while sucking the marrow from a dead trucker’s bones, this is the dating site for you.

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Braaaains smell pretty

July 9, 2008
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Who needs a lawn gnome or a dragon guarding your garden? Protect your azalias from bunnies and squirrels with Toscano’s lawn zombie. Half buried in the ground, desperately hungry for living flesh, your personal zombie will feast on the tiny brains of any woodland creatures daring to come near your daffodils. Also an excellent way to dispose of exes, annoying coworkers, and those darn kids who won’t get off your lawn.

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Do you even have to ask?

May 19, 2008
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Zombie Daily

April 18, 2008
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  Admit it. Pirates are passee. Ninjas are yesterday’s news. Zombies are the new hotness. Want to see the world to come after the [virus is unleashed] [ancient unspeakable evil is ressurected] [metor strike]? Get a new vision of undead wonder every day at Zombie Daily.

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